i think i always bring myself shit circumstances. i always get myself into trouble, but the catch is. trouble i created for MYSELF. sadistic huh?

but still whatever shit, i can't leave in comfort all my life. how nice would it be, to see myself as an angel ascending to heaven with the bright and mighty light shining down on me. that would be the time, i'll live in peace. now? i'm just nothing but a crazy bitch whining away. and wallowing in selfpity. angel? hell to that. i'll never be one. so much for going to church. HA.

tomorrow, i shall tell the world that i've finally lived through one miserable night without getting affected by you. :)

it's church tomorrow, maybe it's time i get happy and excited all over again to go to church. :) maybe it was wrong in the first place, and God's doing me a favour by correcting my wrong doings. Amen. :)

it's once again, maplestory craziness. well, i've got nothing better to do this few days. especially when it's holidays and i've spent ALL my money :) how great! and, i've got no where to go. and days seem weird without you and projects.

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actually, i think i'm just thinking too much. i could live normally without contacting you on normal days. but now, knowing that you might just disappear from my life anytime, i tend to get worked up & frustrated over you. wondering what you're doing. i concluded, it's just all insecurities. :)

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listening : for all you've done - hillsongs.

i'm so hooked up to this song :)

My savior Redeemer
Lifted me from the miry clay

Almighty Forever,
I will never be the same
Cause You came here
From the everlasting
To the world we live
The Father’s only Son And

You lived
You died
You rose again on high
You opened the way for the world to live again

Hallelujah, for all You’ve done

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i think occupying my thoughts with other things except you does me some good. :) at least i wont really bother about you.

but why now, am i ranting nonstop about you in this post?

i've gotta think with a sensible mind, a sensible girl at the age of 16 going on 17. no more the girl you knew when you first met me at the age of 15 :)

and, i shall stop hanging around in front of the computer, or wait aimlessly on MSN ( which i know no one will chat with me ). shall do other things. computers, i had enough. MSN-ing since p6. what the crap. this phase of life shall begin to disappear slowly. i need to find another rather addicting to make my life more interesting & exciting. computers are dull.

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i shall go read books AGAIN :) dan brown - definitely addicting. albeit the lame story plots.

love you. but then, rachel still lives.